The wonderful romance beginning has died. There's another but he is too young. Very handsome, dreamy eyes and beautiful smile but a bit too young. wish he was older I'd really take him up on his offer. The first offer was so sweet and I ruined it. I guess I'm still not over James like I thought. Every time it came close to the time we'd meet, I'd find some excuse or he would not to meet. Maybe someday that will change but for now, I know it's useless to try.
I have had surgery on my arm for a pinched nerve and it's finally getting back to how supposed to feel. The little finger is still numb but Dr. says that will get better in the next 6 months. Right now, it's getting the scars well.
I don't know how I'll feel tomorrow but today I am lost, lonely and sad. Maybe that will change in time but I still can't get James off my mind. I feel so lost, and unloved but I know better. I have two wonderful kids and three great grandkids plus a bunch of friends but it's not the same. No one knows that feeling unless they have lost a spouse. You don't spen 30 years with someone and forget in 9 months. Every thing I do reminds me of how we did those things. I see places we've been and my heart just breaks again. This must be self pity day cause that
is what it sounds like, but I have no one to cheer me in the way James could in just a few minutes. Well guess that's all for now Youre probably tired of reading about a pity party. Hope you and yours feels the warmth of someone close and value them while you have them.
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